Is it Ok To Not Have Your Sh*t Together In Your Late Thirties?

Damn, I am officially in my late thirties. Well, as of the 27th of November, or maybe  I reached my late thirties the previous year, either way, I but now I REALLY feel in my late thirties. Definitely do not like the thought of being an inch closer to reaching the big 400. I get the feeling that people are already itching to tell me that 

I remember when I was in primary school and used to think that by the time I reached 20, or even 18, I would have my life together with a husband, kids, dog and a house with a picket fence. Then once I got to u late teens early 20's my aspirations got a lot more extravagant with a lifestyle that included travel, nights out on the town as a parade of romances and designer bags like the 30 somethings in sex in the city. Ah, those days were innocent, weren't they?

Look at me; I'm now 30. Cough! , yes I own my own home (Or do I mortgage?), am not in my dream job, am still single (perhaps chronically who knows), and a sassy dog mother. While life successes of all my friends vary, with some being ahead or behind in their life than I could ever currently aspire to, I'm unsure about how I feel about my current position in life, what my aspirations are and even what I want my next steps to be.

However, I suppose it isn't all bad. I have reached another year where that bitch Lupus hasn't beaten me; I'm feeling slightly better about my decision to take an unpaid sabbatical from work to concentrate on my health and put thought into my long term goals; I've got a great support network around me, I have a home, I have food, water, electric, clothes on my back and in some perspective, my health. Not exact;y winning the Lottery and all my other ducks may not be in a row, but I want to appreciate all the other things I have in life because others may not be so lucky to have that.

Photo by Luke Webb from Pexels

While I understand that there is no need to pressure myself to be at a certain point in my life, I often have felt like I have fallen behind that place younger Lee-Anne thought she would be at this stage and don't know that I have the energy or the enthusiasm to do a mad dash to get there. However but what I have learnt over the months and years I don't want to sacrifice a work-life balance that won't jeopardise my health balance in order to say I do XYZ to feel important when someone asks me what o do for a living, what car I drive to rock the latest designer handbag or fly first class in a cocoon (I actually do want to fly in a cocoon).

However, I love having the freedom to just be with myself feeling my feelings and letting my body do what it does, and I'm nearly ok with that. 

I will always choose to follow my pathway rather than feeling the pressure and need to follow somebody else's just so I think I have my sh*t together.

But at the same time, I will still have my list of life goals that I would like to achieve.

Yes, the title to this post is a question; however, I'm not looking for people to chime in with their opinions about if it's ok to not have your sh*t together in your late Thirties or whatever age there are. Age is just a number; remember that. 

I genuinely believe that life is for living. You should invest in beautiful experiences and learn as much as you can about yourself, travelling, meeting new friends, going 'out-out', discovering your values, making mistakes, discovering your sexuality and appreciating life.

So, guys, it's ok to not have your sh*t together right now; just enjoy being in your thirties, twenties, fifties, whatever, and you do things in your own time and at your own pace. 


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